Authenticity vs. Oversharing: How to Use Social Media with Intention
I am a chronic over-sharer. In fact, this is the principle Iβve built my entire career upon as a writer, poet, and essayistβnothing is too much when it comes to sharing your heart.
And honestly, Iβve learned this about myself first-hand through years of publishing my words on online verticals and especially in building my businessβa service-based company with a foundation built entirely through personal connections and relationships.
Iβll be the first to advocate for the importance of vulnerability, authenticity, and βbeing realβ on social media.
But where does one draw the line between genuineness and βtoo muchβ? How can you balance the importance of sharing the behind-the-scenes vs. your feeds feeling like a personal diary?
And how does one shift the lens from inward reflection to outward connection?
These are great questions and ones Iβve wrestled with myself (and still do). Iβll start by saying this: while some might consider me an expert as Iβve curated βinfluencerβ following status and provide social media services for clients, Iβm honestly still figuring it all out. I donβt claim to have all the answers. And without a doubt, Iβm going to make mistakes (as we all are) along the journey.
However, Iβm really passionate about ethical social media practices, responsible sharing, and learning the balance between authenticity and an outward lens in order to create content that is truly meaningful.
Here are a few steps to help you assess and potentially shift your current habits:
1. Take Inventory of Your Accounts, Posts & Purpose
The first step to shifting your social media is to take inventory of where you are, what you share, and the reasons why. Whether your accounts are personal or business focused, look at the last five posts and ask yourself: What was my intent?
If youβre not sure or donβt have a definitive answer besides, βI just wanted to put this out thereβ or βI liked this picture,β then consider the engagement. Are people connecting in meaningful ways or are the posts solely focused on praise or recognition?
Taking inventory can be challenging because youβre essentially calling yourself out on current practices. My challenge to you is to be honest and start to think about the purpose your accounts can serve (especially if they are for a business!). If you donβt have a concrete purpose right now, you can consider the following ideas: solving a problem, reaching your audience, offering help/advice, or providing content that encourages.
2. Create a Plan for Posting
Social media can be an incredibly valuable tool for online engagement, business-building, or personal growthβif you use it correctly and purposefully.
One way to do this is to create a plan for posting. This doesnβt have to be as complicated as a full monthly grid with images and scheduled times (although it can be if that works for you!). Your βplanβ can be as simple as thinking about your captions before posting to ensure that theyβre aligned with your goals, brand, and message.
3. Give Yourself Space From the Emotion(s) Before Sharing
Oftentimes we share content in the heat of the moment or as something is happening. This can be greatβand should be done sometimesβbut other times, if we arenβt careful, our message can be lost in the desire to be βrawβ or βtimely.β
Take an important political event, for example. In the heat of the moment you may feel a certain way, but upon researching and learning more, your perspective may shift. And if youβve adamantly shared a one-sided perspective prior, you now have the risk of looking hypocritical online rather than taking the time and space to reflect before posting.
4. Focus Less On Impressing
Undoubtedly, the most poignant social media posts are ones that βkeep it realβ rather than focus on having the βbestβ or the βprettiestβ feeds. Now, donβt get me wrongβsocial media is based on imagery (and Iβm not shaming beautiful feeds!) but thereβs a difference between focusing on the appearances over the content vs. giving the reality to your audience.
Social media can be a highlight reel. This is great, but thereβs an element of trust you build with your audience when you also share the truth with them. Yes, youβre a successful business owner, but do you have struggles sometimes? Sure, you launched an incredible course, but was it a difficult journey? And of course, you have a beautiful family posing for those holiday picturesβ¦ but do your kids sometimes drive you crazy?
Sharing the truth behind the βhighlight reelβ provides normalcy and a glimpse of the βrealβ you. Itβs definitely something valuable (within reason, of course) and if this is something youβve been neglecting thus far, it may be an important and helpful change.
5. Consider How You Relate to Current People & Times
As you navigate the balance between authenticity and oversharing, something to keep in mind is how you connect to other people and the current times. What I mean by this isβ¦consider your audience and consider the world around you. (Click to Tweet)
Are you sharing pictures of your dog during times of political tension? Are you considering conflict, fear, war, or pain that others may be experiencing and incorporating those emotions into the content you share? Are you considerate of your audience and their biases, perspectives, or experiences? Do you check your privilege to create content that is culturally appropriate and/or responsive to current times?
Your accounts are for youβyes. But everything we put in the media as well as on social media is a reflection of who we are/what our business is and what we stand for.
While you donβt need to feel the responsibility of addressing every issue out there, itβs important to find a balance between self-focus and outward-focus in the content you create and share.
Ready to Make Changes? Here are your action steps:
Take inventory of your last five posts and consider the purpose.
Follow accounts that are meaningful and help connect you to different ideas, people, and perspectives. Unfollow accounts that donβt fit your vision or values.
Map out a βplanβ of some sort (specific or big-picture ideas) that define your message and purpose of your account(s)
Think about captions before posting.
Take time and distance from your emotions before feeling compelled to share.
Be cognizant of othersβAsk: How can my content serve others, not just me?
Need other ideas or tips? Iβm happy to help.
Marisa Donnelly is the Founder & CEO of Be A Light Collective, a creative marketplace, online community, and writing/editing services company with a mission of reshaping what traditional education looks like through a relationship-based learning lens.
To learn more about authenticity, you can follow Marisaβs blog (where she writes about it often!) or subscribe to The VulnerABILITY Podcast, a series dedicated to authentic conversations about what matters and how we can actionably move towards better versions of ourselves.
Connect with the author Marisa Donnelly: Website | LinkedIn | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook
